The Grievers Holiday Prayer

The Griever’s Holiday Prayer

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It is Thanksgiving Day…

And again it gives me pause

How did I get this far

Without breaking any laws?

When my child died

The holidays died as well

Her spirit took to flight

While my stayed in hell

A shattered heart cannot decorate

Or go shopping at the mall

Christmas songs and tinsel

Have a lot a gall

How can they say happy holiday

With zest and soul felt cheer

It is an insult to my child

Who isn’t here to hear

How can I say peace on earth?

When there is no peace in my heart

How do I celebrate thanksgiving?

When I don’t know how to start

It is hard to be thankful

Sitting next to an empty chair

It is hard to be grateful

When our child is not sitting there.

But the holidays have a way

Of creeping back into our soul

We learn to live and love again

Only in a different role

Joy seeks a wounded heart

As does the lovers’ kiss

And we realize the love is not gone

It’s their presence that we miss

My child was never lost

She did not run away from home

It was I who wandered on it seems

So desolate and alone

The sun sank slowly every night

Giving birth to another day of pain

 Groundhog’s Day starting all over again

And another day insane

So I stopped looking up, and stopped looking down

And started looking deep within

It was there that I found my lost child

And brought her back home again

Now my child walks beside me

This has redesigned my soul

There is no longer an empty chair

I no longer play a role

A griever on the mend

We keep it real, this is who we are

We bring our child with us

She is not sitting on some star

I will always bring my child

When gathering with family and friends

It’s a gift for everyone

A love that never ends.

On Thanksgiving Day this year

Please say this prayer with me:

I give thanks for what I have

 And the gift of living free

-But more importantly, above all else

I am thankful for what I can give

And for what you have given me”.


Gentle Blessings on Thanksgiving Day 2014

         jessica M                  Mitch Carmody

Dedicated to Deb and Len in legacy to their daughter Jessica Mysiewicz

Poem: To My Avatar on Earth…


Illustration from my book ” Letters to My Son

To My Avatar on Earth…

Weep for yourselves
Please weep not for me
I may have died
But I am also free

No limits, no laments
it is all so okay
this life is just as real
in a very special way

I cannot walk on earth
but I can visit in many ways
look for me upon the wind
or the clouds on a sunny day

In the bird that sings at your window
the eagle that soars in the sky
or the double rainbow on the horizon
I will hold you when you cry

Cry many tears
I hope that you do
It’s good for me
And it’s good for you

Tears honor my life
And they express your deep pain
Your body gets relief
And so does your brain

Shout it out, cry it out
Sing your songs of lament and despair
Grieve your loss unfettered
Remove the masks that you may wear

Unbridle those emotions
Roiling deep inside
The pain of loss needs expression
A grief observed should not hide

If you have not heard from me
It is not that I cannot connect
But I have much to do
And much more to reflect

I have wounds to heal
And so do you
Dead is not gone
Our journey not through

You play your cards
I have yet more to play
The future is a dream within a dream
All we really have is today

I have never left you
So please don’t run away
I am with you always
Forever and a day

There is no closure
There is no moving on
There is only living with the loss
The love never gone

You are now my avatar
I still live through you
Through you heart, through you voice
In all you say and do

Make me proud and sing with me
A duet from our heart and soul
I live on and so should you
A heart broken… can yet be whole

You are my legacy
You keep my world still turning
Together we bring light to darkness
When you keep my candle burning

Thank you for your tears
But I encourage much more laughter
And thank you for not forgetting
I still live in the ever after.

-Mitch Carmody 2015